This is seriously disgusting
lol isn’t the sexualization of infants adorable
Blarg!!! No!!! Makes me sad that these exist.
local gay couple judges saturday morning runners
if i ever dont reblog this assume im dead
what do i do on tumbler
get in your mum’s car
haven’t heard that one before
Day 1: you ripped open my vagina and I hate youDay 5: just kidding you’re so cute and soft and small lol I could fit you in a handbagMonth 2: STOP CRYING PLEEEAASE. JUST ONE HOUR OF SLEEP AND I WILL LOVE YOU FOREVERRRRMonth 5: mama? Mama? Mama? Say it? Please? Say something? PleaseMonth 8: IF. YOU. DON’T. STOP. SAYING. MAMA. THE. POLICE. WILL. NEVER. FIND. THE. BODY.Year 1: One down. 17 to go…Year 1, Month 11: oh god.. it’s coming…Year 2: NO PLEASE JUST PUT THAT DOWN. NNOOO! DON’T TOUCH THAT! Baby, i love you no matter whaT BUT PLEASE DON’T TOUCH THAT JJUST STAY STILL PLEASE SWEETHEARTYear 3: Oh thank god that’s overYear 4: Awwww, you went to preschool. isn;t that adorable, my little intellectual shitYear 5: ACTUAL SCHOOL! YOU LEARNED COLORS AND NUMBERS YOU’RE A GENIUS
Year 15: You called me a fuckwit. What the fuck is a fuckwit?
year 16; oh god no LIGHTLY step on the gas NO NON NO NO YOU DONT HAVE TO PRESS THAT HARD ON THE BREAK!!!
year 17: I caught you masturbating but you didn’t notice so I didn’t say anything. You’re welcome.
"I can help who’s next in line"
sometimes i think that i am not so stereotypical of an american
and then i remember that i consider the coke freestyle machine one of the greatest modern inventions
i mean look at this thing
over 100 choices, computerized mixing, one spout, touch screen, ice dispenser
have u ever seen anything so wondrous and beautiful??
Watching Pokémon on Saturday mornings as a kid
he is drowning
IT HAS BEGUN
THREAT LEVEL PUMPKIN
IT’S FUCKING JULY
WE ARE THE JACK-O’-LANTERNS IN JULY SETTING FIRE TO THE S KY